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Stephanie Rische

Blogger and Writer: Capturing Stories of God's Grace

Archives for April 2016

April 27, 2016

The Blooms You Didn’t Plant

daffsOne dreary Sunday afternoon last month, when I found myself in an unaccountable funk, Daniel motioned for me to join him at the kitchen window. “I want to show you something,” he said. “You seem grumpy, and I think this will help.”

Grudgingly, I shuffled over to the window, not convinced that anything in the bleak backyard would shake me from my Eeyore-like state. My eyes followed where his finger was pointing, but I didn’t see anything un-grumpifying.

Then I looked harder. Was that a shoot of green amid the brown leaves and post-winter detritus?

I gasped. Could it be . . . ?

Daniel just grinned. Sometimes he knows me better than I know myself.

“Daffodils!” I squealed, loud enough for the entire zip code to hear.

Daniel and I moved into our new home last summer, which means this is our first spring here. I haven’t planted a thing, and the other surprises we’ve come across in the house so far haven’t exactly been pleasant ones, so it didn’t occur to me that there might be some mystery perennials in the garden out back.

But when I saw those brave little shoots sticking their heads out of the cold Midwest soil . . . well, it felt like hope you can see with your own two eyes.

***

Long before I met Daniel, when I lived alone in my townhouse, I planted daffodils one November with no shovel, only a dull kitchen knife for assistance. The ground was stubborn, but I was even more so.

I was in a funk that day too. I had prayed about one thing for so long, and I could see no sprouts of hope, no signs that spring would come. I wanted—needed—a tangible symbol of hope.

So I went outside and forced those dead-looking bulbs six inches under the ground.

And then I waited.

Sure enough, spring did come. And that thing I’d been praying for came true too, although in a different way and on a different timeline than I ever could have predicted.

And perhaps most shocking of all was the transformation that happened along the way. Over the course of the long winter, the bulbs transformed from shriveled-up turnipy-looking things into bursts of sunshine outside my window. And somewhere along the way, new life bloomed in my heart, too.

***

Now it’s April, and I marvel at the scene outside my kitchen window—at those clusters of golden, those blooms I didn’t plant myself. And it occurs to me that so often in my life I have benefitted from the perennials other people have planted. They dug deep and packed hope firmly into the soil, and now I bask in the fruits of their labor . . . sometimes long after they’re gone.

There are the parents who planted laughter and love and joy and perseverance.

There are the grandparents who planted faith and loyalty and hard work.

There are the teachers who planted books and words.There are the mentors who planted hospitality and grace.

And I wonder, what are we planting today for the people who come behind us?

They may never fully appreciate the sacrifice.

They may never say thank you.

You may never even meet them face to face.

But somewhere, on some April morning, the bulbs you planted will spring up, like shoots of hope, and those who come behind you will rejoice over the blooms they didn’t plant.

No winter lasts forever.  No spring skips its turn.  April is a promise that May is bound to keep.  And we know it.
—Hal Borland

 

6 Comments Filed Under: Seasons Tagged With: April, daffodils, hope, Spring, waiting
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April 22, 2016

Friday Favorites for April

 friday_favorites_header1

For anyone who wonders what to do with those old books . . .

I have a hard time getting rid of old books, but maybe if I could make art like this, it would be easier: Paper Art Teacups

For anyone who is going to be in a wedding this year . . .

We all know how expensive it is to host a wedding, but what about being in one? This graphic breaks down how much it costs to be a bridesmaid in each region of the country: How Much Does It Cost to Be a Bridesmaid?

For anyone who feels stuck in the ordinary . . .

Sarah Bessey writes about the spiritual epiphany she experienced while cleaning Rice Krispies from her kitchen floor. If you’ve ever felt mired in ordinary tasks that don’t feel very epic or eternally significant, this post is for you: Rice Krispies

For any writers in need of inspiration . . .

C. S. Lewis had some surprisingly relevant insights about the writing process, including tips about typewriters, what topics to write about, and Christianese. 15 Pieces of Writing Advice from C. S. Lewis

For anyone who is grieving . . .

September Vaudrey wrote an achingly beautiful book about losing her 19-year-old daughter Katie to a brain aneurysm. This is the most honest, articulate depiction of grief I’ve ever read, but it’s also laced with hope and joy. “And this is surrender: inviting laughter and sorrow to dance together in our lives, day by day and hand in hand.” If you’ve experienced loss of any kind, I highly recommend this book. Colors of Goodbye

 

2 Comments Filed Under: Friday Favorites Tagged With: books, bridesmaid, C. S. Lewis, grief, literature, motherhood, Sarah Bessey, September Vaudrey, wedding, writing
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April 19, 2016

What It’s Like to Be Married to an Author

book signing 1On the day I brought home a real-live copy of my book to show Daniel, I exclaimed, “Look! We wrote a book!”

He was quick to point out my pronoun usage: “No, YOU wrote a book.”

But I hadn’t misspoken. This has been a Daniel-and-Stephanie Team project from the beginning.

***

I will never forget one woman’s response after Daniel and I got engaged. While everyone else in the room was squealing and asking things like “When is the wedding?” “What will your colors be?” “How did he propose?” she posed a different question altogether: “Do you make each other better people?”

I remember staring at her rather blankly. I stammered something I hoped was vaguely positive, but the truth was, I didn’t really know. I knew that Daniel was a good man and that I wanted to be on his team forever, but did he make me a better person? Did I make him a better person? I hoped so.

Four years and a book contract later, and I now know: He absolutely makes me a better person.

***

Not long after Daniel and I got married, I got this harebrained notion that God was stirring up words inside my brain and heart and that I needed to find some way to get them out. It was Daniel who encouraged me to start the blog, and it was Daniel who convinced me to press “Publish” on that very first entry when I got cold feet.

A couple of years later, it was Daniel who encouraged me to pay what seemed like an extravagant expense for a “real” website.

Then, when I discovered I had a book inside me, it was Daniel who assured me I could do it. When I took days off from work to write, he didn’t complain when he came home to find that not only was the house a mess and there were no thoughts of dinner being circulated, but I had very little actual writing to show for myself.

When the book was finally about to make its debut into the world and I panicked that people would actually be reading it, it was Daniel who prayed for me and reminded me that this was God’s book, not mine.

Yes, WE wrote a book.

So it only seems fitting, now that the book has made its way into the world, that Daniel joined me for one of my radio interviews.

Recently I was interviewed by Frankie Picasso on The Good Radio Network. The morning of the interview she contacted me with an inspiration: “What do you think about having Daniel call in at the end of the show?”

He was game (can we say “Husband of the Year”?), and it was absolutely my favorite interview I’ve done. I’ve been telling my side of the story all this time (all 293 pages of it), and I loved being able to hear his side of things.

Thank you, Daniel—you do make me a better person.

A marriage made in Heaven is one where a man and a woman become more richly themselves together than the chances are either of them could ever have managed to become alone.
–Frederick Buechner

***

To listen to the interview, you can download it or listen online at FrankieSense and More.

2 Comments Filed Under: Love, Writing Tagged With: author, book, Frankie Picasso, Frederick Buechner, marriage, writing
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April 5, 2016

Book Club Selection for May

Lifechanging art of tidying upThanks to everyone who participated in our conversation about A Man Called Ove, where we talked about crotchety old men, cats, and finding purpose in life.

Congratulations to Linda, the winner of the free book giveaway! (Linda, I’ll send you a private message about getting the book to you.)

Our next online book selection is The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. I’ve been hearing so much buzz about this book lately, and besides, now that it’s April, I’m feeling the spring cleaning itch. I hope you’ll join me in reading (and possibly even tidying up)!

Here’s the publisher’s description of the book:

This guide to decluttering your home from Japanese cleaning consultant Marie Kondo takes readers step-by-step through her revolutionary KonMari Method for simplifying, organizing, and storing.

Despite constant efforts to declutter your home, do papers still accumulate like snowdrifts and clothes pile up like a tangled mess of noodles?

Japanese cleaning consultant Marie Kondo takes tidying to a whole new level, promising that if you properly simplify and organize your home once, you’ll never have to do it again. Most methods advocate a room-by-room or little-by-little approach, which doom you to pick away at your piles of stuff forever. The KonMari Method, with its revolutionary category-by-category system, leads to lasting results. In fact, none of Kondo’s clients have lapsed (and she still has a three-month waiting list).

With detailed guidance for determining which items in your house “spark joy” (and which don’t), this book featuring Tokyo’s newest lifestyle phenomenon will help you clear your clutter and enjoy the unique magic of a tidy home—and the calm, motivated mindset it can inspire.

We’ll be discussing this book at the end of May. I hope you will join us!

1 Comment Filed Under: Book Club Tagged With: book club, book discussion, decluttering, literature, Marie Kondo, organizing, spring cleaning, The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up
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April 1, 2016

Book Discussion: A Man Called Ove

A Man Called OveIf I were to pick a handful of words to describe this book, I’d have to go with quirky, endearing, and hopeful. And above all, charming. Which, when you come to think of it, are not exactly the words you might expect for a book that opens with an old man making plans to commit suicide. Despite the premise, this book had some delightfully humorous moments, and I had that pleasant kind of lump in my throat throughout the whole thing. I fell in love with curmudgeonly old Ove, and it was one of those books I couldn’t bear to finish because I wasn’t ready to say goodbye to him yet.

Discussion #1: Are you going to be a crotchety old man (or woman) someday?

Ove stuck to his routines, he liked what he liked, he resisted modern advances, and he balked at change.

This was a world where one became outdated before one’s time was up. An entire country standing up and applauding the fact that no one was capable of doing anything properly anymore. The unreserved celebration of mediocrity. No one could change tires. Install a dimmer switch. Lay some tiles. Plaster a wall. File their own taxes. These were all forms of knowledge that had lost their relevance.

Do you know anyone like Ove? In what ways are you like him (or do you see yourself becoming like him in the future)?

Discussion #2: Everyone has a story.

I appreciate the way Ove’s story unfolds gradually throughout the book, and we come to realize why he is the way he is—and that underneath his gruff exterior, he actually has a kind heart.

All people at root are time optimists. We always think there’s enough time to do things with other people. Time to say things to them. And then something happens and then we stand there holding on to words like “if.”

Do you know anyone who seems tough on the outside but is actually a softie? What does this book say to you about savoring the moments we have with the ones we love?

Discussion #3: Every life has value.

Ove is practical guy—he loves things that are useful and have a specific purpose. But when he loses his wife and his job, he finds himself feeling useless and wondering if there’s any purpose left for him.

What would you say to someone like Ove who didn’t think they had a reason for living anymore?

Discussion #4: On loving well—and grieving well.

Ove eventually finds community—or more accurately, community finds him—in the form of his quirky band of neighbors and a pesky cat that refuses to go away. And in finding community, he starts to process his loss and find purpose again.

Sorrow is unreliable in that way. When people don’t share it there’s a good chance that it will drive them apart instead.

I think this is one of the loveliest passages about old love I’ve ever read:

“To love someone is like moving into a house,” Sonja used to say. “At first you fall in love in everything new, you wonder every morning that this is one’s own, as if they are afraid that someone will suddenly come tumbling through the door and say that there has been a serious mistake and that it simply was not meant to would live so fine. But as the years go by, the facade worn, the wood cracks here and there, and you start to love this house not so much for all the ways it is perfect in that for all the ways it is not. . . . That’s it, all the little secrets that make it your home.”

Rating

I would give this book five stars (out of five) for its rare blend of humor and profundity, for its vividly drawn characters, and for its insights into aging, death, and life.

How many stars would you give this book?

{Be sure to add your comment—I’m giving away a free book to one lucky commenter!}

4 Comments Filed Under: Book Club, book review Tagged With: A Man Called Ove, book club, book review, fiction, Frederick Backman, free book, giveaway, literature
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