Stephanie Rische

Blogger and Writer: Capturing Stories of God's Grace

Friday Favorites for July

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And now . . . for a few of my favorite things for July. Enjoy!

For anyone who has ever tried to articulate whether they like a book . . .
These book reviews by kids are part insightful and part hilarious. Case in point: “This was a good book but it didn’t make much sense.” Book Reviews by Kids

For bookmark aficionados . . .
I realize a scrap of paper or a receipt would work just as well, but I do love a good bookmark. These are fabulous—especially the bedside lamp bookmark. Creative Bookmarks

For anyone who has wondered if their marital status makes them less valuable . . .
Shauna Niequist nails it again: “Marriage doesn’t make you me more special. It’s not a status symbol.” You Are Significant with or without a Significant Other

For anyone who likes to devour books . . .
These cakes are literary and culinary masterpieces. Just wait till you see the Narnia-themed one! Gorgeous and Delicious Literary Cakes

 

Getting a New Name

Shauna Niequist wrote a beautiful post a while back about the old stories we believe about ourselves. Even though God has been at work in us, transforming us and giving us new identities, we continue to buy into old versions of ourselves—or lies we’ve bought into for too long.

In her post “Change the Story” she says:

There are people and situations that take us back to old, old stories, and even though we’re moms now, not children, or even though we’re business owners now, not adolescents, we find ourselves acting out stories that haven’t been true for a long time, or stories that were never true to begin with.

I’ve been thinking about this lately, and I’ve been reminded of those famous words of Jesus: that the truth will set you free.

One of my friends sees herself as nonconfrontational, fearful of stepping into dangerous situations. But as I’ve watched her parent a son with severe allergies, I see how God is rewriting that story. I first witnessed this growing bravery when she discovered her son’s dairy allergy. She was miles from home and husband, but she confronted every obstacle in her way to find out what was happening to her baby and get him the help he needed. And as I watch her continue to advocate for her little guy at restaurants, at school, and on playdates, making sure he’s safe physically and not being left out, she is growing into many shades of brave.

Another friend holds on to an old version of herself—a story that she is slow to warm up with new people, that no would pursue her or connect with her without a long lead time. But over the years, I’ve seen her stepping out in her job, flourishing in her interactions with clients, stepping into new friendships, making herself rightly vulnerable in relationships new and old. And something amazing is happening: people are seeing her for the beautiful woman she is. God is rewriting her story.

For years I’ve believed that I was destined to live in fear. I worried about big things and little things, about the noise in my attic that was most likely a serial killer and about global warming and about losing the people I loved most. I decided that my condition was chronic—that I’d just have to figure out how to live with it. But somewhere along the way, God began to rewrite that script. Instead of keeping a running tally of my worries, I started to track all the ways I’d seen his faithfulness to me. And ever so subtly, I noticed that fear was no longer in the driver’s seat of my life.

One of the things I appreciate about God is that he loves us just the way we are but doesn’t leave us that way. The evidence is there all through Scripture as he discards old stories and gives people new names, new identities:

  • When God gave Abram a promise for generations to come, he told him, You are no longer Abram. From now on, you will be Abraham—the father of many nations (Genesis 17:5).
  • When Jacob had an encounter with God, God told him, You will no longer be called the deceiver. From now on, your name will be Israel—one who has struggled with God (Genesis 32:28).
  • When Jesus met Peter, he said, Your name is no longer Simon. From now on, you will be Peter, the rock (Matthew 16:18).

I hear God saying the same thing today:

  • You are no longer Timid. My daughter, your new name is Brave.
  • You are no longer Unseen. You are my daughter Beloved.
  • You are no longer Much-Afraid. You are my daughter Learning-to-Trust.

What about you? Is there a story that God has rewritten in your life—or one that he’s rewriting now? Has God given you a new name? I’d love to hear about it, I’d be honored to pray for you on this journey.

What Prayer Tastes Like

Have you ever wondered what prayer tastes like?strawberry-apple pie

Up until yesterday it wouldn’t have occurred to me that prayer intersects with the taste buds at all. But now I can say with pretty firm confidence: prayer tastes like strawberry-apple pie.

I asked a friend to pray for me yesterday. There was something specific on my calendar, and I knew it was bigger than me, so I asked her to go with me through her prayers. And over the course of that hour, I felt covered somehow. Braver than usual, more myself than usual. And I knew I wasn’t alone.

Later that evening the doorbell rang, and it was my friend and her family. In her arms she was carrying something warm and wrapped in a dish towel. When she put her bundle on the kitchen counter and pulled back the cover, a heavenly aroma wafted into the room. It was a homemade pie. Sweet strawberries mingled with cinnamony apples. And it was still warm from the oven.

“I wanted to do something with my hands while I was praying for you,” she said.

I’ve had people tell me they were praying for me before, but it’s not every day that you can see the results of someone’s prayers—let alone taste them.

When I took the first mouth-watering bite, I thought, So this is what prayer tastes like. Sweet and tangy and baked to perfection inside a golden crust.

I pictured my friend rolling out the dough, asking God to smooth out the path before me. I imagined her slicing strawberries and peeling apples as she prayed for God to cut away the obstacles. I envisioned her scooping the flour and sugar, all the while requesting extra measures of wisdom and guidance.

As I licked the last few crumbs from my plate, I thought about what a brilliant idea a prayer pie is. If the thing you’re praying about utterly flops, your sorrows go down much easier à la mode. If things go well, what better way to celebrate than to toast with a forkful of pie? And either way, you will know that the hands that made it were the same hands that prayed you through.

So I guess that’s what prayer tastes like. A little like homemade pie. And a lot like love.

Dear Dad: A Non-Apology Letter

I heard the sickening scraping sound before I saw it. A piece of wood trim that had been firmly attached to the garage just moments before. I was only 16, my license shiny and new in my wallet. Still, I knew better, Dad. And I should be sorry for peeling out of the garage and ripping off a chunk of the wall. But I’m not.

Do you remember that day as clearly as I do? Mom was out of town, and you let me drive her car while she was gone. It was a big deal—the first time I got to drive myself to school instead of taking the bus. I was well aware that this was a privilege, and one that could be easily revoked. But I heard the school bus coming, and I knew that if I didn’t hurry, I’d be stuck behind the bus all the way there.

So with single-minded focus, I backed the car out of the driveway, eyes on the rearview mirror, scanning for the bus. That’s when I heard it. First the scraping, then the thunk. The wooden trim around the door was no match for the side of the car. But there was no time to assess the damage. I kept driving.

I should be sorry about the car, about the garage door you had to fix, about my lack of responsibility. But I’m not. Because that evening, when I told you what I’d done (which you’d already pieced together), you played for me notes of grace that have echoed in my ears ever since. You didn’t let me off the hook—as I recall, we spent the evening together with a hammer, a few nails, and a bucket of paint. And later that night, I had a confessional phone call to make to Mom.

But in that moment you showed me what forgiveness looks like: you loved me just the same in spite of what I’d done, and then you went to work doing the cleanup right alongside me.

I wasn’t sorry several months later, either, when I won the safe driver contest at that ceremony at the fancy hotel. Remember how I looked over at you, wide eyed, when they announced my name? I knew there was no way I deserved it. But you just winked at me, nudging me to go up and accept the award.

Can you believe it’s been almost exactly twenty years since the infamous garage door incident? If I’d backed out the way you taught me, I wouldn’t remember that moment all these years later. So no, I’m not sorry, because right then I knew that whenever I crashed again at some point in the future—whether behind the wheel of a car or otherwise—I could come to you with the broken pieces.

dad car

Some days when I’m back home visiting you and Mom, I walk past the same garage door, with the repainted trim, and I marvel that it’s intact again. To anyone else, it probably looks as if nothing ever happened. But I’ll never forget the ugly squeals and scrapes I heard that day, followed by the echoes of pounding grace.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

An Editor’s Unexpected Job Hazards

writingI suspect every job comes with its share of hidden job hazards that they don’t tell you about in your interview—perils that likely aren’t covered by worker’s comp, either. Here are a few of the hazards I face every day as a result of my career choice.

1. It’s almost impossible for me to read without a pen in my hand.
I can’t help but recall that ill-fated time I was reading Middlemarch for a book club I was in. I was about a third of the way into the book, having been happily underlining and scribbling marginalia for several hundred pages, before I remembered it was a library book. I had no choice but to plead my case to the stoic librarian: “What can I say? An editor always reads with a pen!”

2. My hands are crisscrossed with paper cuts.
After flipping through sets of galley pages, my hands always seem to end up in a jumbled, haphazard mess. And I have to say, it’s not as easy as one might expect to straighten several hundred 11 x 17 pages into a neat stack. Inevitably, just as I’ve gotten the pages almost presentable enough to pass on to the next person, the paper slices through that tender spot on the palm of my hand. (But I have to say, it’s well worth it to see those words coming together in a form that closely resembles a book.)

3. I’ve come down with an incurable case of pen snobbery.
I used to be able to write with a pen like a normal person—meaning that the primary prerequisite for a pen is that it contains ink and gets your message onto paper. Not so anymore. Now if it’s not a Pilot Precise V5 Rolling Ball Extra Fine, I find myself in a vague state of panic.

4. My nightstand is perpetually on the verge of collapse.
Being around authors, editors, story lovers, and word people all day means my list of books to read is inexhaustible. At any given time, I’m probably in the middle of approximately five books—a book for each of my book clubs, one for spiritual edification, a nonfiction title in hopes that I’ll become marginally smarter, and a fiction book that’s purely for fun. I have a book to read in the morning and one to fall asleep with at night, a book to listen to while I’m working out and one to listen to during my commute. They say the first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. . . .

5. My days are marked by book-induced feelings.
When I was editing a book filled with stories about Southern Cooking, I found myself perpetually ravenous for fried chicken, and I’m pretty sure I snacked my way through all two hundred pages. When I worked on a book about a man who climbed Mount Everest , I felt cold all day and had to layer up my outfits for a month. When I was editing a football player’s manuscript, I suddenly had a vested (and unprecedented) interest in which teams would make it to the Super Bowl. When I worked on a book by a Texan, I shamelessly started saying y’all (you have to admit it’s more charming than the Midwestern “you guys”).

So take warning, all of you aspiring editors out there. These job hazards could haunt you too, should you commit yourself to a life of books. (But trust me, it will be worth every paper cut.)

So what are the unexpected hazards of your job?

Friday Favorites

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Here are a few of my favorite things lately. Enjoy!

For anyone who literally wants to devour books . . .
I was amazed by these lush photos of “the most memorable meals in literature.” Fictitious Dishes

For anyone who spends an inordinate time choosing the right font . . .
If you make a scientific discovery and announce it in Comic Sans, will people take you seriously? How Typeface Influences the Way We Read and Think

For anyone struggling to find balance in their relationships . . .
Shauna Niequist says, “Cooking and cleaning never built a marriage. But listening and memory-making and looking each other in the eye will.” On Laundry and Love Stories

For anyone who wishes they could take their favorite book with them wherever they go . . .
I love books a lot, but I’m not sure I’m committed enough for permanent inking. 20 Book Tattoos

 

 

Looking for Your Next Summer Read?

Yesterday was Memorial Day, which means that summer is officially here! And besides the cue that it’s officially time to switch over your wardrobe and plant your flowers, it also means it’s time to find your next summer read!

Before I give you my list, I should qualify what I mean by summer read. These aren’t “beach reads”—fluffy, forgettable books to pass a lazy day in the sun. They’re books that will take you into other worlds (and generally happy ones, since it’s summer and all).

So here you go—my list of books to read this summer:Guernsey Literary

The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society by Mary Anne Shaffer and Annie Barrows: An utterly charming World War II novel told all through letters.

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime by Mark Haddon: A quirky and endearing coming-of-age story told from the perspective of a boy with Asperger’s.

Bel CantoBel Canto by Ann Patchett: A lush story that will mesmerize you and make you never want to leave.

The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie by Alan Bradley: A Nancy Drew book for grown-ups.Forgotten Garden

The Forgotten Garden by Kate Morton: A captivating story of generations and self-discovery, with a splash of mystery.

Now that I look at this list again, I’m noticing a striking pie theme. Maybe my subconscious is looking for something sweet this summer!

What makes a good summer read for you? What’s on your to-read list?

 

 

Unveiled

It’s there in every look, every conversation, every relationship—that gauzy veil that separates us from each other. We talk about safe things—the rain, how busy we are, how we can’t wait for Friday. But the moment things start to edge toward vulnerable, we blush over the nakedness of our souls and gather the veil a little tighter around us.

This isn’t a new thing. It’s been the human way for a long time—all the way back to Adam and Eve. They tripped, they fell, they shattered their perfection communion with God. And immediately they looked for a covering, something to hide behind (Genesis 3:8). But our God—he delights in uncovering. They tried to hide from him, but he pursued them, found them, loved them.

Then there was Moses. He kept his face veiled before the people because they couldn’t handle the radiance that reflected from his face. But God didn’t want a veil to separate Moses from him. He alone met with Moses face to face, with nothing between them (Exodus 33:11).

And then there was the greatest unveiling of all, on a Friday some two thousand years ago. As Jesus hung on the cross, he felt the weight of our separation from God. He saw how we are veiled from the Father, how we long to meet with him face to face, but we’re held back by our sin, our shame, our fear. And so, as Jesus breathed his last, he tore away all that keeps us veiled from God. The Temple veil sliced open, and in that single moment, he invited us to meet with our God face to face, without fear (Matthew 27:51).

So what can pull back a veil? It is love—only love.

At that critical moment when people say their wedding vows, it is the one who loves who pulls back the veil of his beloved. Like a groom who lifts the veil from his bride’s face, Jesus comes close to us, peeling away each gauzy layer until we are intimate, exposed . . . until he’s so close we can feel his breath on our cheek.

And we tremble, fearing what he’ll say once our flaws are laid bare before him. But when we finally gather the courage to meet his eyes, we see only love on his face. Pure, unstoppable, unquenchable love. It has been there all along. We just couldn’t see it until the lifting of the veil.

So what is holding you back today?

It’s scary. I know. But I urge you to begin this journey toward vulnerable love. Come close enough to let him pull back the veil. Love is waiting on the other side.

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.
—C. S. Lewis

A Reservoir of Joy

 

Addie joy

We call my niece the Pterodactyl. Don’t worry—we’ll stop when she gets old enough to find such a moniker unflattering (not to mention difficult to spell). But she’s only six months now, so I think we can get away with it for a while longer. (In case you’re wondering what a pterodactyl sounds like, click here.)

When I first heard Addie’s pterodactyl shriek, I couldn’t see her face, and I assumed she was “hangry” (hungry, angry, or some combination of the two). But then she turned her head, and I saw that she was scrunching up her nose and smiling the biggest one-toothed grin you’ve ever seen.

Whenever something delights her—the wagging tail of a dog or a spoonful of sweet potatoes or the entrance of one of her people into the room—she kicks her legs, flails her arms, and lets out a string of squawks. As her grandpa put it, she laughs with her whole body.

As you might imagine, this made for hours of entertainment when Addie was recently in town for a visit. With a six to one adult-to-baby ratio, you’d think we would have gotten a lot accomplished. But in reality, it just meant there were six grown adults hovering ceaselessly around our little bird, attempting whatever antics we could think of to evoke a squeal.

I had fleeting thoughts that we might be irrevocably spoiling her, but then I talked to a wise friend who said, “I think it’s great. She’s building up a reservoir of joy that will serve her well the rest of her life.” A reservoir of joy. Now that’s something I can work with.

My prayer buddy Marilyn tells a story about a little boy who loved watching the lightning whenever it stormed. Every time a flash lit up the night, he’d say, “Yay, God!”

After watching this happen several times, his mom finally asked him, “Why do you say, ‘Yay, God’ whenever there’s lightning?”

The boy grinned. “Mom, don’t you know that God is taking my picture?”

When do we lose that, I wonder—that sense of delighting in God and knowing we delight him? More often than not I come to him sheepishly, shamefacedly, my record of sins and shortcomings fresh in my mind. The thought that he’d hover around me, delighting in my smile, trying any antic to make me laugh, rarely crosses my mind. If the thought of God enters my mind when lightning flashes, I’m more likely to assume judgment than doting.

But take a look at this image Scripture paints of God’s character:

He will take delight in you with gladness.
With his love, he will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.
—Zephaniah 3:17

Whether or not you ever had a gaggle of grown-ups surrounding you, may you know today that your Father delights in you. He rejoices over you. He sings over you, grinning over your every squawk and squeal. And may the knowledge of how treasured you are become a reservoir for you . . . a deep reservoir of joy.

Carbonated Holiness

DesmondTutu

Last week I had the privilege of hearing Desmond Tutu speak. Having long admired him for his opposition to apartheid, his commitment to reconciliation, and his compassion for the oppressed, I was eager to hear what he had to say.

As he walked up to the podium, escorted by one of his daughters, he looked just every bit as dignified as I’d imagined the Archbishop of Cape Town would be. Dressed in a clerical robe, with professorial glasses perched on the tip of his nose, he exuded confidence and peace.

Just as I’d hoped, his words were full of wisdom, drawn from several decades of turmoil and hard-won victories in South Africa. But there was one thing I wasn’t prepared for. His laugh.

Oh, that laugh! (You can listen to it here.) The first time I heard it, I glanced around the stage to see if someone else had joined him up front. It was a high-pitched sound, full of utter glee—more of a giggle, really. Surely it couldn’t be coming from a man of such distinction—someone who had witnessed so much suffering during his lifetime. But as his talk went on, there was no denying it: that laugh was coming straight out of the mouth of Archbishop Tutu. And it was contagious: every time he let out his trademark giggle, the rest of us couldn’t help but laugh too.

As I sat there trying to commit the sound to memory, I was reminded of the quote by Anne Lamott: “Laughter is carbonated holiness.”

As a human race, we tend to take things pretty seriously. We take our jobs seriously. We take our relationships seriously. We take our faith seriously. We take the problems of the world seriously. We take ourselves seriously. And this is good . . . to a point.

But God never meant for us to trudge through life so soberly. As the book of Proverbs puts it, laughter is good medicine. Perhaps the best thing about the prescription of laughter is that it chips away at our pride; it reminds us that we are merely human.

Archbishop Tutu recounted a story of a woman who had approached him on the street while he was traveling. “Oh, I’m so happy to meet you!” she exclaimed, shaking his hand. “You’re Archbishop Mandela!”

He could have been indignant about her error. He could have enumerated his impressive credentials. Instead, he laughed. Recalling the moment, he couldn’t contain his delight. “It was as if she got two for the price of one!” And that giggle again.

I want to be more like Archbishop Tutu—treating important things with the gravity they deserve, but remembering that we’re also wired to laugh.

So this week, what will I choose?

  • Will I be humble enough to laugh at myself?
  • Will I experience the freedom of not taking myself too seriously?
  • Will I make sure pride doesn’t steal my opportunities to giggle?
  • Will I experience the healing that comes from medicinal laughter?

This week, may laughter bubble up inside all of us until we have no choice but to let it out, like so much carbonated holiness.

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Do you think laugher can be holy? Have you ever felt the healing effects of laughter?