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Stephanie Rische

Blogger and Writer: Capturing Stories of God's Grace

May 4, 2017

Book Discussion: The Road Back to You

Thanks for joining us for the virtual book club on The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile! It’s easy to participate. Just read the book and then at your own convenience, add your thoughts to the comments section. You can respond to any of these discussion questions—or just say what you thought of the book.

And as a bonus, I’ll give away a free book to one lucky commenter!

***

I am a geek about personality types of all kinds—Myers-Briggs, the five love languages, even what your coffee selection says about your reading style. So suffice it to say I was fairly giddy when I starting hearing buzz about the Enneagram. A type system with a spiritual twist? Sign me up already! But the books I read just didn’t seem to click for me. I found myself unsure of my number (whatever that was) and confused about how this applied to my life.

Until I found The Road Back to You. This was the book I’d been looking for—one that brought the Enneagram from an esoteric level into real life. Ever since, I’ve been urging as many people as possible to read it—if only so we can share the same lingo (“Oh, that’s definitely what a 2 would do!” or “She must be a 7!”).

Discussion #1: The Spiritual Implications

One thing I found unique (and at times squirm-inducing) is that unlike other personality tests, the Enneagram doesn’t just pat you on the back and say, “Aww, you’re a golden retriever! Good for you! You are special!” It focuses not only on your strengths but also on your proclivity to sin. It’s not just about what you do but why you do it—your deeper motivations.

As I read, I found myself doing some gut-level introspection. Why do I do this? Why do I fall into this cycle with my loved one? And while this was convicting and at times uncomfortable, it was a growing experience for me to dig into parts of myself I take for granted and open my eyes to the unique temptations I face based on the way I’m wired.

To know oneself is, above all, to know what one lacks. It is to measure oneself against Truth, and not the other way around.
Brother Dave

Did you learn anything about yourself as you read this book? Did you buy the concept of the Enneagram—that each type has certain strengths but is also driven by a particular sin?

Discussion #2: What’s Your Number?

One thing that surprised me about the Enneagram is that it wasn’t a straightforward process to determine my number. With other personality tests, I tend to get pretty consistent results, but in this case I took several different tests and got several different numbers. After doing some research, I found that this is not uncommon. And according to people much more well versed in the Enneagram than I am, the wrestling you go through on your way to discovering your number is actually an important part of the process. It forces us to dig deeper into who we really are and what makes us tick.

After back-and-forthing for a while, I think I’m a 6 (the Loyalist), which means my besetting sin is fear. I read somewhere that the description that makes you most uncomfortable is probably the one you are, and that sounds about right!

The original, shimmering self gets buried so deep that most of us end up hardly living out of it at all. Instead we live out all the other selves, which we are constantly putting on and taking off like coats and hats against the world’s weather.
Frederick Buechner

What do you think your number is? Do you think it’s possible for people’s number to change over time?

Discussion #3: Diagnosing Other People

I know, I know—the authors urged us to worry more about our own number than other people’s, but I can’t help but diagnose everyone I meet now! Anyone with me? This may have downsides (I don’t want to box anyone in), but overall I’ve found the Enneagram to be helpful in understanding the people I love. When I can see what life is like through the lens of their unique disposition, I have more empathy and more ability to understand what they act the way they do.

For me to be a saint means to be myself.
Thomas Merton

Do you find yourself trying to type other people too? Has this book given you any insights into the people you love?

Rating

I would give this book 5 stars—not because it’s a literary masterpiece but because it has prompted hours of the good kind of introspection and some really meaningful conversations with friends. I recommend that you read it and then loan it to a friend. Then go get a big cup of coffee together and talk about until you get kicked out of the coffee shop!

If you want to learn more about the Enneagram, I also recommend the podcast that goes along with the book.

Remember: I’m giving away a free book to one lucky commenter!

27 Comments Filed Under: book review Tagged With: book club, book discussion, enneagram, Ian Morgan Cron, literature, personality types, Suzanne Stabile, The Road Back to You
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February 7, 2017

Announcing the Virtual Book Club for April: The Road Back to You

Thanks to everyone who participated in our discussion about The Trouble with Goats and Sheep. We talked about whether you’re a goat or a sheep, the awkwardness of preadolescent friendships, and the neighborhood snoop in all of us.

Congratulations to Elizabeth, the lucky commenter who will win a free book! (Elizabeth, I’ll send you a separate message about getting the book to you.)

And now . . . announcing the selection for April! (I like to alternate between fiction and nonfiction, so nonfiction is up this time.) We’ll be reading The Road Back to You by Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile. I have been hearing oh. so. much. about the Enneagram lately, and I wanted to find out more. I started the book already, and I am hooked—I think you will be too.

Here is the publisher’s description from the back of the book:

Ignorance is bliss―except in self-awareness. What you don’t know about yourself can hurt you and your relationships―and even keep you in the shallows with God. Do you want help figuring out who you are and why you’re stuck in the same ruts?

The Enneagram is an ancient personality typing system with an uncanny accuracy in describing how human beings are wired, both positively and negatively. In The Road Back to You, Ian Morgan Cron and Suzanne Stabile forge a unique approach―a practical, comprehensive way of accessing Enneagram wisdom and exploring its connections with Christian spirituality for a deeper knowledge of ourselves, compassion for others, and love for God.

Witty and filled with stories, this book allows you to peek inside each of the nine Enneagram types, keeping you turning the pages long after you have read the chapter about your own number. Not only will you learn more about yourself, but you will also start to see the world through other people’s eyes, understanding how and why people think, feel, and act the way they do.

Beginning with changes you can start making today, the wisdom of the Enneagram can help take you further along into who you really are―leading you into places of spiritual discovery you would never have found on your own, and paving the way to the wiser, more compassionate person you want to become.

I hope to hear your thoughts on the book in April! Meanwhile, happy reading!

{Remember: I give away a free book to one lucky commenter, so be sure to join us!}

9 Comments Filed Under: Book Club Tagged With: book club, book discussion, enneagram, free book, giveaway, Ian Morgan Cron, personality type, The Road Back to You
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